I remember
how we used to sit on the phone for hours
listening to the smiles in each others voices
and enjoying the shared airwaves
where we existed
together
but separate.
Separate in space
Separate in time
Too far apart to reconcile the differences
that space and time created
Too far apart to reassess, to address, the gaps
that ripped us apart at the seems.
I remember
thinking about how we could last forever
that you and I would find a way to make it.
But we didn't.
I should have known.
I should have realized.
I should have remembered.
That love is only in fairy tales,
and romance is the basis of bedtime stories and cheap novels,
nothing else.
I handed you my heart
and you gave it back to me, in pieces.
All you ever gave me
was a reason to cry myself to sleep.
I'd like to say that there are times
I can look back on and smile at
but if I did,
we both know I'd be lying.
So maybe I should:
sugar coat my memories,
fabricate smiles in my mental repertoire.
You never could believe a word.
If I told you I am starting to
remember
how to be happy
What new crisis
would you push upon
my
fragile
psyche?